I write this while half-battling withdrawals on Seoul, cold weather and Big Bang. Half-battling, only because half of me does not want the feeling to go away. I miss so many things about Seoul, even if it left me bedridden with the sickest cold, cough and fever for days. If I had the money, I would fly back in a heartbeat.
But enough about my withdrawals. I’m here to tell you my story. One thing I regret after seeing Big Bang for the first time last October 2010 is that I wasn’t able to get a hold of myself and write a decent fan account. I am doing that now, sans the “decent” part.
This whole trip was a rollercoaster ride from start to finish. I was supposed to go to Seoul with two other VIPs, but one of them was denied a visa, while the other simply had too many personal issues to deal with outside fangirling. About a couple of weeks before the start of my trip, I was slated to go alone… that is if I was lucky enough to be granted a visa. Thankfully, I got one. I already spent a huge deal of money just getting tickets for all three days of Big Show and booking my flight (‘cause Cathay Pacific had the cheapest deal that time, and we all know their “cheapest” rate is not exactly that cheap), and if my visa application got denied, I was bound to lose more than 35,000 pesos. Ouch, I know.
Fortunately, a week before my trip, things started to fall into place. I got my visa, and also found a travel buddy, who’s just about as crazy as I am for Big Bang and Kpop. Vikki’s a household name in the fandom scene as she runs the biggest international fansite for Big Bang, Big Bang Updates. It was like traveling with a celebrity, haha.
I arrived in Seoul on the night of the 29th and took a transfer service to my hostel in Myeongdong. Now that I think about it, I should have just taken the subway because barely anyone takes it near midnight. I was initially planning to move my flight earlier so I could catch JYJ Junsu’s musical “Elizabeth”, but Cathay ran out of seats for the earlier flights.
MCD B.A.P Pre-Recording & Myeongdong Shopping
I basically started my trip on the 1st of March by going to CJ&E Entertainment to watch MNet M!Countdown. If you know me, I’m a sucker for nugus, so it was pretty easy for me to find a fanclub to blend in with. I lined up with B.A.P fans, aided with their debut album and got a chance to watch their first stage for their follow-up song “Secret Love”. Yongguk and Zelo killed it, and I’m not only saying this because I have a weakness for rappers. Their flow was so on-point and Zelo is just a force to be reckoned with. Surprisingly, I found Daehyun quite boring in real life, or maybe he was just shy… and shy boys are not for me. Youngjae is really handsome; the boy needs more love. The other members were charismatic too.
After the show, I couldn’t bear the cold so I left Digital Media City and went around Myeongdong. I saw the opening of Super Junior Yesung’s new optical store, Why Style. Too bad I didn’t stick around long enough to see him bum around the place. I was distracted by Big Bang’s Alive songs, which were playing full blast on literally all streets of Seoul. So I ended up going round and round, wasting more money and finally crashing at my friend’s place when my feet could no longer take the cold.
Big Show
The next day, I met up with Vikki, checked in at a new hostel and went straight to Olympic Park for the first day of Big Show. It was… surreal. It was like seeing past pre-concert pictures jump out of web pages and photobooks, and just blow up before your eyes. I still tear up a little when I think about it. While I was lined up to claim our tickets, Vikki lined up for the fangoods. As early as 3pm, goods started selling out, but I managed to grab most of the stuff I wanted before finally preparing to enter the venue. Time flew by quickly, and before we knew it, we were already inside the stadium. The following events will be a mixture of reactions and experiences from all three days of Big Show.
To be honest, I’ve never really been to a full-length concert of any of my two biases (Big Bang and Beast). I’ve been to several shows and fan meetings of Beast, and have attended one concert with Big Bang in it but they were with other Kpop artists then. I’ve never been to any of their solo concerts. Seeing a sea of yellow crownsticks glitter like stars in the night sky was just a spectacle to behold. The crownsticks would move to the beat of the songs, like fireflies dancing to every note of the melody. It was breathtaking. Like no words and verbosity can do it justice.
When the lights turned off, the intro video started and we heard the sound of a slow heartbeat. Everyone stood up from their seats and the crownsticks started moving to the same beat. An old English voice (ala-Star Wars meets Anthony Hopkins) started telling the story of Big Bang as chosen ones, frozen through time to come back to the future and save the earth. They were placed inside human test tubes and thrown from outer space to land on the face of the earth. When they finally landed on earth – or I should say the stage (via the CGI effects) – the huge white cloth covering the stage dropped on the floor and we saw Big Bang frozen inside actual huge test tubes while Alive was playing.
Chills ran down my spine. My God. They sounded a-m-a-z-i-n-g. The camera focused on each one of them and I felt tears stinging my eyes. Not even all the curses in the world could calm me down. Each member was holding onto a gas mask, which I wanted to grab for myself only because I really felt like I needed oxygen too. When the tubes finally opened, they started with Tonight and the pyro effects just went insane, giving off an explosive intro.
And I lost it. The whole stadium erupted into what seemed like a crowd of crazy fangirls partying to every song. My hands were up in the air and I clung to my crownstick like it was my guide. Everyone was dancing and singing. They followed the song with Hands Up before the boys started with their introduction. GD was ugh, so… idek, I love him. Daesung rocked the blonde and TOP was out-of-this-world GWAPO! Seungri gained a few muscles, and Bae still cracked me up in a good way. At the back of my mind I was like, “My boys…” After four years, I was finally here.
When they started with Fantastic Baby, I already sensed epicness in the air. And true enough, the choreography was insane. Add to that the wicked light choreography and stage effects, the whole stadium was jumping and dancing with the boys. They followed this with the undying How Gee and Stupid Liar. After a short talk time with Bae, Dae and Ri, special/solo stages started with GD&TOP unit. It’s one of my lifetime fangirl dreams to see High High live, so I was soooooo thrilled to finally watch it in real life. Not to mention, Ppeogi Gayo. They brought out white Chinese dragons with streaks of neon hair. It was crazy and fun, just how I like my GD&TOP performances.
After GD&TOP’s stage, a huge helicopter appeared through the CGI effects. Seungri came out through an elevated stage with a huge gun in his hands. The tip of the gun had a strong laser light which he used to aim at all corners of the stadium. The dancers on the stage were all dressed in black soldier outfits. To be honest, I thought I was watching Taeyang’s solo until the second Seungri appeared onstage. He sang the walang-kamatayang Strong Baby and one of the songs I was looking forward to the most that night: What Can I Do. He also did an amazing dance break that pretty much tore the entire stadium down. In my opinion, Seungri is not the best dancer of the group (Taeyang is) but his stage presence is just undeniable and his fan service is gold. The whole concept can be summed up in one word: BADASS.
After Ri’s solo, the rest of the boys came back and did Gara Gara Go and Number 1. One of the countless other things I love about YG is that they have such good-looking backup dancers. In Tagalog, walang tapon. I mean there’s Jihye, the Kwon Twins, Cheoljun… I can go on and on. One of the Kwon Twins, Yongdeuk even stood in front of me on Day 3 while changing his clothes (this happened in the middle of Seungri’s solo, I think). My eyes were literally jumping out of their sockets. Ang gwapo! I swear I wanted to pull him closer, if only I won’t be side-eyed by a dozen other people near me in the pit. So anyway, one of my favorite parts in Number 1 was the butt-spanking c/o Taeyang. It’s sad Aimee Lucas (one of Big Bang’s past choreographers) wasn’t there to dance for the boys, ‘cause I love her and it would have been extra exciting if she was there. But the dancer who was paired with Taeyang was almost as pretty and that epic moment still lived up to my expectations.
These two numbers were followed by a short talk, which led to an intimate and a lot more stripped-down version of Cafe. I love Cafe, even GD’s lulzy falsettos that sometimes go off-tune. It’s one of their best songs, and Daesung’s part just allows his voice to resonate through you. It’s so full of soul. When Cafe finished, the boys walked back to the center of the stage and that’s when Bad Boy played. Bad Boy was just Taeyang’s song. It’s all his. The other boys did great too, but Taeyang was just in it. He became the song. And yes, he becomes embarrassing at times and starts abusing the dougie, but he sure knows how to make love to the beat of the track. Like I said on Twitter, it was a baby-making song, choreo and errthang. I will forever adore TOP’s fail-singing here, heh.
They exited the stage after Bad Boy and right before the huge screen started playing a new intro video. The video began with a light snow, which soon turned into a snowstorm. One of the commendable things about the stage setup is that the videos are played in one huge background, layered with other boxed LCD screens to sort of portray a 3D effect. This makes the experience more exciting and well, worth the won, haha. After a few seconds, Blue started playing and GD entered the stage while singing the intro. DaeRi soon followed, then Taeyang, while TOP came last. What I love about Blue is its lyrics. One thing that really made me a fan of Big Bang is their music. They are what they sing; their music is from them and about them. They’re not dependent on popular composers, and they burden themselves to surpass what they’ve already done. Blue would literally translate into a love song, but from the lyrics itself, the fandom knew the song draws from something deeper.
It was taking a while for Ain’t No Fun and Love Dust to grow on me pre-Big Show, but when I finally got the chance to watch them sing the songs live, it became impossible not to love them. Ain’t No Fun, in specific, was such an adorable track. They did it with a bed at the side of the stage (which I actually don’t know the purpose of) and with some random girls flirting with the boys. The G-Ri moments here were just heartwarming. I need the DVD like yesterday. My favorite part in Love Dust would have to be Daesung’s near the end. He sings it with such brevity and truthfulness, it made my eyes well up with tears. I’m just so glad he’s back.
After the last two songs from the mini, Taeyang finally did his solo. And thank heavens and all that’s good because he came out with Naman Barabwa. I died. Naman Barabwa, for me, was the best song Taeyang ever released and is one of my favorite Kpop songs of all-time. I was like half-cursing, half-crying, simply because I didn’t know what to do with myself. To top off this killer intro, he did Wedding Dress next and it felt like sending my soul to heaven right after dying with the first song. And when he did Where U At, I just lost it. He combined this with a powerful dance break, complete with the dubstep and krumpin. He just took everything to the next level, I was just so proud to even actualize a proper reaction. Oh, and he tore his shirt near the end… on all three nights. I was jokingly telling my friends that Bae prolly had 5 disposable shirts for him for each concert. One he tears open during his solo, the other he takes off sometime during the show, two get thrown at the audience, and the last one is the shirt he wears until he’s off the stage.
Daesung came next after Taeyang. He came out on an elevating platform at the topmost part of the stage. He looked stunning. The lights showed off a golden ray that just made everyone go, “Awww…” It was beautiful, to say the least. Daesung is our angel, and only VIPs would understand how heartbreaking last year’s events were for him, the members and the entire fandom. To see him come back on stage after everything, still doing what he does best, and smiling that huge wonderful smile that we dearly missed, the feeling is just indescribable. When the dancers came out near the end carrying something in a huge black cloth, my heart started to race. I knew we were in for a surprise. They hung the secret prop on Daesung’s back and when they pulled off the black cloth, big white wings unfolded from his back. And that’s when the tears crawled down my face. My heart just swelled with so much pride and happiness. Our Smiling Angel was truly and finally back.
(Not my pic btw. Credit as tagged.)
And the tears didn’t stop there. After Wings, the rest of the members came back and did what I would say was the best version of Haru Haru yet. It was done with a live band, but the song came out raw and so stripped down, it was just so intimate and truthful. No one tried to outdo another member and everyone was so in sync. Although GD and Tabi missed their timing at the start of the song during the first and second nights, their raps were ringing with so much passion and angst. Seungri’s voice had improved so much since debut and it blended so well with Daesung’s and Taeyang’s. After the bridge, the boys suddenly stood up and stopped singing although the band kept on playing. Slowly, the boys approached the audience and that’s when Seungri asked us to sing. This perhaps, was my favorite part of Big Show (and also the part where I cried the most). The entire room was filled with the voices of VIPs singing to the lyrics of Haru Haru while slowly waving their crownsticks to the beat of the song. That moment will forever be locked away in the deepest recesses of my heart. It was one of those moments when your world stops and suddenly you fall in love with the band, the fandom and the music all over again. It was that magical moment. During the second night, after the fans sang the chorus, the boys were so teary-eyed to start singing again that they had to ask everyone to sing the chorus once more. Seungri pointed at the camera with that knowing look and said “Saranghaeyo,” like how you would when someone just won you and your whole heart over. I was a mess from Day 1 to Day 3 during this part of the concert. And so were the rest of the people watching the boys with me.
After that unforgettable number, Seungri said something like they were about to perform their last song. We all knew he was lying because, well, every concert has an encore. They did Lies first, which is one of those songs that I will never get tired of watching live. During the third night, Jiyong got a little teary-eyed when the band started. He smiled and bowed his head, while the rest of the boys walked up to him. The members put their arms around him with smiles on their faces. They had that look as if to say, “It’s okay hyung, we did it.” It was another one of those krayola moments haha. After Lies, they did Last Farewell, and that’s when the crowd started dancing and partying again. When the song finished, the boys exited the stage and all the lights went off as if to say the show has ended.
Of course, no one bought it. The VIPs started chanting “saranghae” instead of the usual “en-ko-re” to ask for the boys’ return. On the second night, we chanted “komawo”, and “hamkehae” (let’s be together) on the third. Another goosebumps moment. Amazing how fandoms work.
After a few minutes of chanting, another hi-tech video played and the Star Wars voice also returned, announcing that some sort of orb was the actual mission for the boys. They needed to find this special orb in order to return to where they came from. I was guffawing at the silliness of the concept (and the voice) to be honest. When the boys came back, they did Sunset Glow first. On the first day, it was the usual encore stage where the boys were running around and playing with fans from different areas. But on the second and third days, it was a lot crazier. Dae and Bae went out in huge inflated balls and they were thrown at the pit. This was the exact reason why I decided to sell my seated ticket o Day 3 and look for another ticket in the pit area. The moment I saw that on the second day, I told Vikki, “Dude, we need to be in the pit tomorrow. There is just no way I’m not getting in there.” And up until now, I am so glad we made that decision because seriously, nothing beats the pit in SK concerts.
Word of advice to concertgoers in Seoul: if you haven’t been in the pit, you haven’t experienced anything yet. It was like a totally different world in there. The crowd was crazy, yes, that’s a given. But the passion and the high there were more unbelievably insane. Sure, it was fun in the seated areas. I was on the second floor on Day 1 and on the third floor on Day 2, but nothing’s as hardcore as the people in the pit. It’s like being at the center of all the adrenaline rush and the intense partying. It was extremely hard to move even just an arm because there was barely any breathing space. I finally understood why a lot of people faint in there. It was a good thing in the middle of the songs or while the boys were talking, the security people would hand out small paper cups with drinking water just to make sure we don’t get dehydrated. The whole show was seamless and there was no lull moment so there was really no intermission or free time to regain your strength. You have to be on your feet for the whole three hours or so. I loved how people jumped and danced like one big lump during Fantastic Baby and Last Farewell. If there’s one thing I love about this fandom is that we sure know how to party, and boy do we party hard.
They followed Sunset Glow with Heaven, which is another one of my favorite Big Bang songs. I love how GD always acts so carefree on stage when this song starts playing. He becomes that little Jiyong that we all love. During this part, the boys just ran around the stage while waving and touching the fans’ hands.
What’s extra special about Day 3 was that right after Heaven and after the rest of the dancers and other people exited the stage, Big Bang still didn’t want to leave. They just stayed there like lost boys, thinking of something else to do. The boys talked to each other in Korean, and from what I understood, they felt like doing another encore because they just didn’t want to leave yet. You could tell this was totally unscripted since even the band was asked to plug in their instruments again (thanks to Ri and his lulzy English). We were asked what song we wanted to hear and I screamed for Fantastic Baby, while Vikki wanted Bad Boy. The entire audience was split between the two songs too. Taeyang said Bad Boy, but in the end TOP said something like, “Why don’t we do Bad Boy first, then do Fantastic Baby after that.” And so they did. That was perhaps the most hardcore encore ever. The whole stadium just erupted into another huge party. Everyone was dancing and singing to the songs, especially during Fantastic Baby. Of course, Taeyang stripped earlier on during the show, and on all three days. But on the third day, they also got Daesung to take off his shirt. Seungri also whored himself out by lifting his shirt and baring his abs during his part in Fantastic Baby encore. It was a wild encore. I was screaming for TOP to take shirt off too, but lol, we all knew I was just gonna die trying. The dance parts during Fantastic Baby were just overflowing with energy, and… ugh, I can’t even describe how awesome and mad it was. It was such an unforgettable close to an incredible 3-day show. The boys were off the charts!
After the Show
We never really had the time to go around the booths and other activity areas (save for the ones selling official fangoods) during the whole 3 days. I was stuck in line for claiming tickets during Days 1 and 3, and was out to tour Korean palaces on Day 2 (for the sake of showing my mom I wasn’t just there to fangirl… although I really was, hehe). So after the concert on the third day, we finally had the chance to take pictures of the many blown-up tarps and photos around the concert venue.
We also saw the boys leave the stadium after Days 2 and 3. On Day 2, I was a little closer to the boys so my fancams were all over the place. One of the security people shoved my camera down twice, I almost dropped it on the ground. That was when Daesung’s car stopped right in front of us and he opened the car window to wave and smile back at us. He was so sweet. Taeyang was so upbeat too, he kept on jumping around and waving at everyone… it was so adorable. TOP and Seungri also said goodbye to us, but for some reason no one saw GD leave that night. I don’t know how we all missed him.
On Day 3, I got a better spot for taking fancams. It was a little far from the exit, but I decided to just stay there since I couldn’t go home without any video memory of Big Show. YG is very strict when it comes to taking fancams during the concert. Once you get caught, you get sent out. From what I heard, they either take your memory card or ask you to delete all the files in front of them. Sadly, when you get sent out, it meant no more Big Show for you for that day. I saw one Japanese fan get sent out on Day 2 while taking a picture of the intro video. Yes, just the intro video. And she never got the chance to see the boys come up the stage or do anything. Fancams are serious business in Korea. I don’t know how those Korean stans do it. It takes years of practice, and this is already coming from a fan who’s been taking fancams from all over the world for the past four years. I guess I still need more practice.
And that ended my Big Bang escapade in Seoul. Vikki was a lot luckier than me because she stayed in Seoul for an extra week and got a chance to watch their comeback stage pre-recording on MCD, K-Collection Fashion Show (Big Bang was also there along with SNSD, Secret, Infinite, etc.) and TOP’s Fubu event in Myeongdong. I was jokingly telling her “Quota ka na sa Big Bang, oy.”
Last Day in Seoul, KPop Tour
Yoseob’s Family’s Cold Noodle Shop
On March 5, my last day in Seoul, we took a Kpop trip to Apgujeong and Seokgye. We went to Yoseob’s parents’ cold noodle shop in Seokgye, which is a must-visit for Yoseob and Beast stans because they have an adorable Beast shrine there. And well, the world knows Yang Yoseob is my ultimate Kpop bias, so I just had to go there. The moment Vikki and I stepped in, we were greeted by Yoseob’s dad, and I immediately fell silent because… aaahh, it was just nerve-wracking to see someone really close to Yoseob in person, plus be in the same place he has prolly been to a billion times in the past. When Yoseob’s dad came to our table to take our orders, I immediately told him I was a fan. In broken awkward Korean, which he prolly barely understood, but I was taken aback when he smiled and asked me in perfect English, “Where are you from?”
I felt my mouth drying a bit while I answered, “Philippines,” in a weird stuttering tone. I know, I am an embarrassment. OTL It was a good thing we were the only ones in the restaurant so we took the time to take pictures of every corner. Like seriously. Every. Corner. I am a crazy stan that way.
While paying, I asked Yoseob’s dad if we could take a picture together, and he was kind enough to say yes. I was so giddy and excited, you could just see it all in my face.
Kona Beans
After that cray moment at Yoseob’s parents’ noodle shop, we went to Kona Beans in Apgujeong, which was the newly opened coffee shop of the moms of SUJU’s Leeteuk, Sungmin and Kyuhyun. It was a good thing I was with Vikki because she was a lot more familiar with the fandom than I was. I was only armed with the map to the shop and a blurry memory of Leeteuk’s mom’s face care of my friend Cherry, who is prolly the biggest Leeteuk stan in the world.
We got lost because of the fail map drawn by dancingkyu. It was funny because we even saw Supreme Team’s Simon D crossing the streets of Apgujeong while we were busy getting lost. We decided to randomly go in and out of streets and that was how we finally found Kona Beans. When we got there, the atmosphere was really cozy and relaxing, though you can tell a LOT of fans were there. Fans were also taking pictures of every corner of the cafe. The walls were filled with photos of the members which was a feast for the eyes of ELF. I sat in one corner and ordered a random Konaccino from the menu. Vikki had coffee, I think… I don’t really remember. We didn’t get a chance to try their food because we were still full of the noodles we ate back at Yoseob’s parents’ place.
While having coffee, I caught a glimpse of Leeteuk’s mom who was talking to a couple of Japanese fans who were asking her if she was indeed Leeteuk’s mom, haha. No one seemed to recognize her, and that was when I asked Vikki if she wanted to take a picture with her, since Leeteuk, after all, was her SUJU bias. We finally approached Leeteuk’s mom and once again practiced my broken Korean to ask if we could take a picture with her. She smiled and gladly said yes while placing her hands around Vikki’s arm. After that, I asked her if I could take another picture of her… just her, to give to Cherry. I was surprised when she suddenly placed her hands around my arm, and the next thing I knew, I was there taking a picture with her. She was just so sweet and warm-hearted. Leeteuk stans, you have an amazing future mother-in-law.
After taking pictures with Leeteuk’s mom, we decided to leave Kona Beans since we still had a lot on our itinerary. We were taking pictures outside the cafe when we suddenly saw Leeteuk’s mom hurrying out of the place. It looked like fans crowded around her in the cafe and she probably got scared and decided to leave. It was a good thing we already took pictures with her.
Yoochun’s Timeout Gelato
We set out on foot to our next destination after leaving Kona Beans. We went back to Apgujeong station and came out of another exit to find Yoochun’s famous gelato store. It was actually a store he gave to his mom. We knew the place would be less crowded that day because Yoochun was scheduled to have a press conference somewhere in Seoul for his new drama Rooftop Prince. So yeah, naturally all his fans would be there with him. When we got inside, there were a few Japanese fans around spazzing over the Yoochun photos and shrines.
Like the two other places we went to earlier that day, the surroundings of Timeout Gelato were also a feast for the fans’ eyes. I’ll just let the pictures do the talking:
I tried Swiss Chocolate and Green Apple Yogurt (only because it was Yoochun’s favorite). And as I predicted, I loved the chocolate but the yogurt was too sour for my liking. Sorry Yoochun, I still like you and you are still my bias.
Se7en’s Yeolbong Chicken Restaurant in Gangnam
We were originally planning to have early dinner in Abiko Curry, the famous Japanese curry restaurant of 1TYM’s Baekhyun, but we’ve searched the entire Gangnam and asked almost 10 people but no one knew where it was.
While finding Abiko Curry, we accidentally came across Se7en’s Yeolbong restaurant and decided to eat there instead. It was still a blessing in disguise, because we saw YG’s resident choregrapher, Jaewok, in the restaurant along with other YG dancers. We also took pictures of the cute photos hanging on the tree inside. There were pictures of Big Bang and other artists who have been to the place. Of course, we only took pictures of Big Bang.
Their chicken was extra spicy, that we had to soak them in soup just to be able to eat them. Take note, we ordered the mild one, so I don’t know how we would survive eating the spiciest dish. Nonetheless, it was a good meal. We were still able to finish almost the entire plate. Kami na ang hindi gutom, haha!
When we got out, I saw a familiar restaurant near the side of the street, and lo and behold… there was Abiko Curry! We wanted to burn the streets, to be honest. We wasted more than an hour just trying to find it by foot, and now that we were no longer looking for it, it was right there in front of us!
Oh well, there is always next time.
A Beastly Close to a Big Bangin’ Vacation
On our way back to the hostel past 6pm, I got a message from my B2uty friend in Singapore, confirming that Beast has left Singapore and is now on their way back to Seoul. I already knew about their flight details the morning of that day, and Vikki and I were planning to meet them at the airport but we realized on our way back from Gangnam, we already spent so much and buying a bus ticket to the airport was just not practical. I still had some cash left but I did not want to go alone.
After playing with the subway app on our smartphones, we decided to still give stalking a go since we realized we still had enough time to go to the airport in time for their arrival even if we took the subway. Plus, it was way cheaper if we took the train. So at past 8pm, we headed out once more, taking the subway to Incheon International Airport.
For the love of fandom nga naman.
We got to the airport at exactly 10pm, and Beast’s flight was scheduled to arrive at around 10:10pm. When we got there, we looked for the huge screen displaying the status of the departing and arriving flights. When we finally found Beast’s flight, it read: LANDED. Vikki and I started panicking and asked a random ahjussi for the directions to the arrival section. We ran our way to the gates and were just in time to see the passengers start exiting the doors. We still had enough time to sit around and set up our cameras. We immediately knew we were in the right place because you could see fans carrying DSLRs and waiting with fangifts in their hands. Adrenaline rush once again.
I told Vikki the boys will most likely go out by groups so if things get haywire and we lost each other, I just told her to look for Yoseob, and I’m gonna be wherever he is. Around 15 to 20 minutes after, we finally saw a glimpse of the boys. I was like, “OH MY GOD, YANG YOSEOB. BEAST… MY BOYS!” For the nth time in this bloody trip, I was tearing up once again.
Doojoon exited the gates first with Yoseob trailing from behind. At that moment, my eyes were fixed on Yoseob and I think I jumped past three benches just to catch up with him. While following him on the way out, I saw a fan approach him while handing a gift and leaning her head on his shoulder. I was like, “Wait, pwede yun?” I was so used to not touching idols, because, well their managers can get a little rough with the fans sometimes, and well, even Yoseob can be moody too. So yes, it was an instant confirmation that he was in a good mood! I suddenly found myself walking next to him on his right while his manager was shooing fans away from his left. He was holding his passport and other stuff in his right hand, and suddenly transferred all the stuff into his left hand for reasons I don’t really know. So yes, his right hand was just there, free for anyone to grasp.
I hesitated at first, but after a split-second, I found my left hand on top of his right hand and the very first word that came out of my mouth was “OPPA”. I don’t really know what made me say that, because firstly, Yoseob is not my oppa, and secondly, I hate the word and would never call my biases or anyone that (at least in real life). I don’t know what had gotten into me. My mind was afloat in what seemed like one gigantic dream.
Yoseob responded by looking at me and bowing back. He had a mask across the lower part of his face, which I was somewhat thankful for, otherwise I would have died if I also saw him smiling at me. So yeah, I could only see his eyes staring directly at me. At least I was able to hold my ground. And I was already satisfied with the bow and the fact that my left hand was still on his right hand while we were walking out of the airport doors.
But here’s the best part. After he bowed to me, he suddenly opened his right hand so he could hold onto mine. It wasn’t a tight hold, and it wasn’t loose as well. It was just right. The same way you would hold another person’s hand when you want to walk with them. So FUCK YES, holding-hands-while walking ang peg namin ni Yang Yoseob! I swear, I still can’t believe it up to this very day. Everything in me was probably trembling and falling apart at that time, but he held onto my hand. And I don’t know how long or short it was or how it all ended, but I continued to walk with him all the way to their van. And up until he had to get inside their van, he never once let go of my hand. I fell in love all over again.
I AM THE HAPPIEST YOSEOB STAN IN THE WORLD. YES.
After that momentous Yoseob moment, I walked back to the airport, and that’s when I was taken back to reality. I was like, “Wait, dalawa lang yun… asan yung apat pa???” I ran my way back to the arrival section and saw the other fans still waiting there. I saw Vikki too on the way back and she asked me where I was and I briefly recounted to her what happened. I showed her my fancam too. She was like, “Ah kaya pala di ko nakita, akala ko blonde pa rin si Yoseob.” Winner ka talaga Vikki! Hahaha.
Junhyung was the next to walk out, and this time I just trailed behind him and didn’t even attempt to touch or start a conversation. Aside from the fact that I will most likely not get an answer, I was still reliving my Yoseob moment back then. Junhyung was literally right in front of me so my fancam was focused on the back of his head. There was a moment when we got trapped inside the two doors going out of the airport. So yes, I had the same breathing space as Yong Junhyung (adik lang). Hahaha.
After Juhyung boarded the van, I ran back again and this time saw Hyunseung and Dongwoon exiting the gates. I didn’t bother greeting Hyunseung because I immediately saw the look on his face, and knew he wasn’t in a good mood. And if you stan Beast, you would know this was the best thing to do. I walked next to Dongwoon instead and said, “Hi Dongwoon!” He said, “Hello,” back with a huge smile on his face as he reached out for the gifts and letters the fans were handing him from all directions. He still hasn’t changed, not one bit.
When Hyunseung and Dongwoon were already inside the van, I went back again to look for Kikwang, but there was no sign of him and fans were already starting to vacate the area. I thought, “Asan si Kikwang? Di nila kasabay?” I also welcomed the idea that he might have taken an earlier flight, but that was impossible because my friend would have told me if that was the case. Vikki and I decided to go to KFC instead and grab something to eat. While watching fancams, that’s when I noticed, Kikwang was right behind Yoseob on their way out. So it turned out, I was walking right in front of Kikwang the entire time. Yes, he was right behind me. I’m sorry, Kikwang, Yoseob was all to blame, hehe.
After eating, we took the last subway trip back to our hostel. It was fun and memorable, because right before the subway stopped at our station, the train was completely deserted. Vikki and I had it all to ourselves and got the chance to goof around and take a pic at all corners of the train.
And So It Was
I finished writing this fan account 2 months after I flew back to Manila from Seoul. So much for a very busy schedule and lousy memories. I will always remember how I hated this city on my first day, and how I eventually fell in love with the people, the culture and the weather until the very second our plane left for Manila.
It felt like leaving home.
While Japan is still my dream travel location, I think I’m going to find myself coming back to Seoul more often. So yes. Big Show 2013, count me in.
Hiker's Final Train Station 